While you may be very proud of your friends moving up quickly, it can be challenging not to compare yourself to them or feel less accomplished when you aren’t seeing the same progress. Making comparisons is normal and bound to happen, but it’s a slippery slope that will get you nowhere. While you’re constantly checking in on what that person is doing or thinking about their accomplishments, you’re not thinking about yourself or the next steps you could take in your career.
Take a moment, to be honest with yourself. Address how you feel, and don’t be embarrassed about those emotions. After identifying your thoughts, reframe the negative ones.
Focus on identifying the positive impact of having accomplished peers. You may have more to gain from having a successful circle than you realize!
Are there skill sets you lack that they can train you on so you can also move forward?
Can their growing network open up a new network for you?
Can their financial success mean a potential investment in your dream?
Can you learn from their formula for success?
Note the adage that all that glitters isn’t gold. While they may have a higher title or pay, there may be other stresses they are dealing with that you are not yet equipped to handle. Social media and LinkedIn show the best of what people do and what they want you to see. But, unfortunately, no one will show you the nitty-gritty of their work life.
Stop making time for frenemies. The people that are closest to you need to be your support group. You have competition all around you, but if you notice that your personal relationships are competitive, then it’s time to have a real talk about what you’re feeling and assess what can be done. If you are still regularly feeling resentful and anxious when you connect, it is time to quit the destructive relationships.
Focus on staying true to your course. Remind yourself that you are on your own path and that a slower start does not mean finishing in last place. There were several search engines that were more reputable and reliable before Google, and now most people can’t remember any of them. Your time will come if you are persistent and focused on your work. Stop wasting time on comparisons; you have your own “Google” to build.
When your friends are killing it, strive to be proud of them, learn from them and stay in your own lane. Some healthy competition is good, but it should not make you less excited about your friend’s accomplishments.